Dysable the Enabler

Unfortunately today addictions of many kind are common in society. There must be many of us who are exposed to loved ones and friends dealing with addictions and maybe at one time we may have had our own story to tell. For some reason society has managed to create a need for drugs that is being filled and creating so many problems. We have fear now over drugs that kill as well as the "usual" fears around drug abuse. Being there as a support for others trying to conquer addiction is a place we may find our self in at some point in our lives. Unfortunately not everyone believes in rehabilitation centres so there have to be alternate paths to healing. We may make ourselves available to help someone but if we are not a drug counsellor or if we have not had the life experience our self we may have to be careful about how much help we can actually offer. When we try to help a family member, we could run into all types of unexpected problems because we may be just too close to the situation to see what is going on and what is truly needed. We may find ourselves trying to help someone with their drug issues and maybe we come to realize that we are not really helping at all. There is such a thin line between helping and enabling so it is a sticky, tricky path to walk. If you have someone who actually is being successful in overcoming drugs that you are helping, there is that chance that they may begin to see you as their Savior and that is a shaky path to walk upon.

When we choose to idolize another, we dig a hole for our self which is really hard to climb out of while we see another as our reason for being happy. I am not saying that you don't need someone who can help but when you become so attached to that other that you begin to idolize them, then there may by trouble ahead. If something happens where this person is no longer in your life, what will you do, how will you cope. Will life be worth living? The problem will continue to exist until you learn to recognize the Creator within you. You must learn to see the good within you that creates and manifests all that is in your life. Giving everything you are to another will eventually make you feel less, and brings about insecurities and doubts that you can actually be and do you on your own. Not only for you but for the one you choose to give your power away to. No one can live up to being put on a pedestal unless they truly are egotistical. It feels so good when someone recognizes the good within us and compliments us and thanks us but to constantly have to live up to the image of being "the great one" who fixes everything and everyone can bite deeply into ones self esteem as we try hard to live up to the image and think we have to continue to fix everything. It is so much easier at least for me when I give it back to the person by acknowledging that they are the ones that chose to heal and move forward in their life and they are the one doing the work to better their lives.

One way to bypass this dilemma of becoming an enabler is when your worshipper is giving you thanks for once again fixing them, to somehow mention the Creator, or God or the Goddess, whatever Higher Power that you and/or they believe in. Pass the thanks in that direction and encourage the other to give thanks to their Source. Connecting with our Source, our Higher Power is a healthy way of letting go of any addictive problem whether it be mental, physical, or spiritual. Give them back their power in some way and let them know that it is with the guidance of the Creator that their healing was made possible. Encourage them to have faith and to believe in not only themselves but the power of the Universe to provide them with what they need at any given time.

Embracing the Divine within is being able to see and feel the light within us, that place where creativity and goodness exists, that place of healing. When we connect with and hold on to that feeling we experience the true love that we have for our self and are able to share this with those around us. This is where self hatred and fear melts away, where we can find that familiar place within that we call home. So just try to make it a daily practise to give thanks to the Creator for your life and your dreams, passions and that which make up your daily routine and each day you will feel more satisfied, more fulfilled with this gratitude.